You're on my mind
you never really go away.
I don't have to think really hard
Unless I try not to feel the pain.
Many seconds, minutes, hours, days
I have to stifle the fire
For fear my heart will go up in flames.
Many hear me say, "the baby thing"
You're not a "thing"
I just can't handle the
beating, crushing, smashing, crumpling, tugging, burning, blazing, tangling, suffocating, head numbing, exploding, drumming, muscle weakening, moment stopping feeling in my chest.
So I do what comes naturally to me
I pretend it doesn't hurt as bad
I immerse myself in much too much and become overwhelmed.
All the while trying to keep in mind what your loss taught me
Life is short, temporary, and to make each moment count
You don't always need words to make your mark in this world
Being there for the ones you care for the most to you will make your mark for you.
That mark when nurtured will naturally spread outward.
There is strength in the darkness, you just need to run to the light.
Remembering you, feeling all this, reminds me to prioritize
I need to nurture what matters most to me and not what I think people want me to nurture.
And thus begins again, this never ending cycle.
The never ending of losing and never knowing you
The forever burning fire.